I used to stay on the sand, averting my eyes…

Walking along the beach, I’d often trip on rocks and seaweed because I was too busy staring into the surf. I averted my eyes from a surfer passing me. They filled me with such deep shame. I wanted to surf but I felt too undeserving. I could have bought myself a surfboard and started at any time, but my lack of body confidence and just general anxiety held me back.

Eventually the need to surf became too great and I couldn’t let negativity hold me back anymore. I got my surfboard in December. I’ve been attempting to charge ever since. Failing most of the time, but having fun anyway is my surfing style. I’m not going too badly. I’m out in the water and paddling for those swells, whereas old me used to stay on the sand and wish I could be surfing.

I’m doin’Β all right.

Yeah…I reckon I’ll be fine.

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10 thoughts on “I used to stay on the sand, averting my eyes…

  1. On the outside we are the sport of aloha and good times.

    On the inside, it is hardly like that. There are intimidating people. Muscular people. All in a sea that is unforgiving.

    But we all started off getting knocked around. Falling. Looking foolish.

    Sometimes we experienced types forget this.

    Keep it up!

    • Ohh even now at some breaks, some guys…Whoa. It’s so intimidating – especially being a beginner – especially being a FEMALE beginner! You know you stand out; you know they’re watching you…but they completely ignore you – even in the carpark. It’s eerie!

  2. You post reminds me of one of my favorite songs, “More than Fine” by Switchfoot.
    Here’s a few lines…

    When I wake in the morning
    I want to blow into pieces
    I want more than just okay, more than just okay

    When Im up with the sunrise
    I want more than just blue skies
    I want more than just okay, more than just okay

    Im not giving up, giving up, not giving up now
    Im not giving up, giving up, not backing down

    More than fine, more than bent on getting by
    More than fine, more than just okay

    Cheers.. Your doing Better than Fine…

  3. Thanks for the inspiration. Maybe I’ll give it a go next time I am in Oz for a while. Of maybe even out in Tofino, our surfing area on the west coast.

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